Manage Your Anxieties

We already know that many anxieties stem from your Script, this one traumatic incident in your early childhood that imprinted itself on your subconscious. Let’s say that you were bitten by a dog when you were little and ever since then you shied away from dogs. You are afraid of them. Every time you get close to a dog, any size or breed, your heart starts beating faster, you skin gets clammy, you start to sweat, you walk to the other side of the street, and if that dog is off the leash, you run as fast as you can just to get away from this dog, even if it’s just a little dachshund that can’t possibly hurt you.

This is irrational behavior and you know it, but you still can’t shake it off. So what should you do?

Start by talking to your subconscious. Imagine the subconscious mind as a computer: all the data is stored there safely – but it takes programs to access it. These programs are your attitudes and beliefs about every aspect of your life that you formed from childhood on. Your Scripts are also such programs, whether positive or negative.

You can easily see how we are controlled by our subconscious mind and how important it is to find ways to communicate with it. Both meditation and hypnosis are excellent conduits to the subconscious mind. Like meditation, hypnosis creates a state of deep relaxation and quiets the mind, only much more intense and with the intent of bringing about changes in emotions or behavior. When you are hypnotized, your attention is more focused and you are more open to suggestions. You feel uninhibited and relaxed because you tune out the worries and doubts that normally keep your actions in check. Through meditation and hypnosis you can rewrite your Script and change the fear of dogs into appreciation of man’s most beloved companion!

We’ll talk about the techniques to use for meditation and self hypnosis in a later Blog.

Learn How To Meditate!

Meditation is a wonderful way to relax the mind. I know, because I learned to meditate. It’s easy, everyone can do it, and once you get the hang of it – you’ll love it!

The mind races at 50-60,000 thoughts per day. It has no “off button”. Even at night, the mind keeps going and produces the most wonderful – and sometimes horrible – dreams. When pleasant thoughts cross your mind, you automatically relax, all tension leaves your body and you feel great. After a pleasant dream you wake up refreshed and ready to take on the world. When something is bothering you, however, your thoughts become a prison – anytime you try to break out of it, the confining thoughts pop up again like barbed wire, keeping you confined to dwell on them. Your body tenses up and physical pain is added to the emotional pain that you are trying to rid yourself of. Meditation helps to break this vicious cycle.

When you practice meditation often, you will find that your self-interest and self-concern will change. Instead of dwelling on your Script and all the negativity associated with it, you will uncover inner resources of compassion and wisdom that will help you overcome obstacles and act in beneficial ways towards others as well. These activities will reduce your suffering, and the process will come effortlessly through the simple practice of meditation.

What is a Script?

When you hear the word "Script" you are probably thinking of a writing of some sort, like a movie script. Actually, that's close - except that when I use the term "Script" I am referring to your life's Script.

Everyone lives by a Script. A child's Script is formed usually between the ages of 4-7 years old; these are the “growth” years during which a child is most malleable. Whatever happens during these years, whether good or bad, forms a lasting impression in the child's mind and soul. A spider bite can turn into a lifelong phobia; a bullied child becomes a bully himself as a defense mechanism; a ridiculed fat child has no self esteem as an adult; and an abused child never trusts anyone.

And even if nothing out of the ordinary happens during those years, children learn by imitating the adults around them and thus habits are formed that have their roots in the words and actions of their parents, teachers and other adult role models.

A Script is the blueprint by which we live our lives. For more information on this fascinating subject go to www.7stepstopersonalfulfillment.com

Do you know how a caterpillar changes into a beautiful butterfly?

It all starts out with a tiny egg laid by the female butterfly, out of which the larva or caterpillar emerges. Its only job is to eat, and it does a very good job indeed eating and growing bigger and bigger. In fact, it grows so big that its skin cannot keep up with it, so the caterpillar has to shed its skin several times. Each time it re-appears from the old skin it looks a little different, more colorful and more alive. And finally, after five rounds of shedding old skin it is ready for its final metamorphosis from a lowly caterpillar to a gorgeous butterfly! There is much to be done in this final stage before the transformation is complete: wings are fully formed, antennae are formed and the chewing mouthparts of the caterpillar are transformed into the sucking mouthparts of the butterfly. This final state takes a bit of time, about 10-14 days, but when it’s finished and the magnificent new creature emerges, spreads its delicate wings and rises up to greet the sun – you know that it was all worth it!

Biology lesson, you ask? No, just an analogy: you see, you could be like this caterpillar, growing every day, shedding layer and layer of limiting beliefs about yourself and your abilities, stage after stage until you too are ready to spread your wings and live the life you have always dreamed about! Your SCRIPT holds you in shackles now; it confines you to imaginary boundaries that you bump into with every step you take. You feel trapped – yet all the while you know that there is a butterfly inside of you ready to experience the world.

In Chapter 5 of my book “7 Steps to Personal Fulfillment” I will show you how to release your shackles, how to shed your skin, and how to grow golden wings that will lift you to the heavens with the promise of a glorious life!

What are your Inner Voices telling you?

I met a young man once in India who taught me a valuable lesson. He was the driver assigned to me by an industrial company to take me to their various factories in the country. We spent a lot of time together in the car, passing time with idle chatter that soon led to discussions about his life and his family. Vasu was poorer than the poorest, at least by my standards, yet he carried himself like a man of great wealth, who had not a worry in the world. I pried to get more information and quite accidentally he divulged his secret: his name, Vasu, means “wealth” in Sanskrit. Vasu’s Inner Voices were telling him that he was blessed with wealth, and hence he was not bothered by the holes in his shoes. He saw abundance in what little he had, and did not focus on what he lacked. He was a very wise young man…

The image that you have of yourself is what shapes your destiny. Nothing else matters. For decades I had an image of myself that held me back from achieving personal and professional fulfillment in spite of significant successes in business. My Inner Voices (greatly influenced by my SCRIPT) were telling me that I could never achieve great things – and I believed them. I second-guessed myself every step of the way. The reversal of my fortunes came when I started to change the way I thought about myself.

How do you judge yourself? Have you ever asked yourself “what did I do that for?” or “what was I thinking?” Have you ever internally chastised yourself for “being so stupid”, for “acting like an idiot”? Such words serve no purpose – they only tear you down, make you feel unworthy and destroy your self esteem.

Think positive words. Train yourself to reject every negative thought that comes into your mind. Never, ever voice a negative thought about yourself, not even in jest! Every time you say something – positive or negative – it reinforces your belief in whatever you expressed: if you say “I’ll never get rid of those extra 10 lbs” – guess what, you won’t, until you train your Inner Voice to say: “I’m fabulous, and those extra 10 lbs will come off in a jiffy!”

Start challenging your Inner Voices now. See Chapter 7 of my book “Seven Steps to Personal Fulfillment” for exercises you can do to help you in this process.